Wu-Tang Killa Beez, we on a swarm
Wu-Tang Killa Beez, we on a swarm
Wu-Tang Killa Beez, we on a swarm
Wu-Tang Killa Beez, we on a swarm
- Wu Tang Clan, Clan In Da Front.
Way back in history three thousand years
In fact every since the world began
There's been a whole lot of good women sheddin' tears
For a brown eyed handsome man
It's a lot of trouble was brown eyed handsome man
- Chuck Berry, Brown Eyed Handsome Man.
扯旗山下有一門小門屋村幫
大懶堂嫡系掌門人 我係第十八代
要打出個名堂 唔覺意又打出個袋
寶刀出鞘 師父出馬
打交出事 又馬交出火
唔係好識耍羅漢拳 但係就成日食羅漢果
五十五重天 薄荷冰火
練女心經唔怕走火 又射歪
移形換影屎忽幽靈
睇住兩個麻甩佬 又入埋同一格廁所
咪耍我 話匿埋入面 拆迷魂鎖 有無攪撚錯
豪放北派四味賓泰 呢頭跳完茶舞轉頭 又話有Coupon派
攬住兩件馬騎呢怪一皇三后大格又睇邊個夠快
啜一聲就話派晒軟腳蟹
- LMF, 詠春拳.
A (mis) interpretation:
Name: Wu Wei (無爲).
Alias: Handsome Wu (靚仔無).
Age: 23.
Affiliation: The Eight Pandas (八 熊 貓).
Rank: Panda Merc One (兄傭兵熊貓).
Abilities: "Boundless Fist" (太極拳), "Eternal Spring" (永春), "Iron Shirt" (鐵衫), "Iron Palm" (铁掌); "Touch of Death" (點穴) - martial art; "Good Luck" (好運) - tychokinetic combat; peak physical condition; cunningness; charisma; allure; physical attractiveness; self-healing.
Std. armaments: "Wu Hah" (嗚啊) - .25 semi-automatic pistol x 4; "Strike Rich Panda" (發達熊猫) - cosplay battle suit x 1; "Thunderclap" (霹靂) flash bang grenade x 16; "Panda's Paw" (熊貓爪子) - lightning claw x 2.
The Eight Pandas is a group comprise of specially selected eight individuals whom are martial art masters and mercenaries. They are part of the Wudang Sect (武當派) based on a fortress monastery of the partially destroyed Wudang Mountains, Eastasia. The Wudang Sect is a secret organisation which has been in existence for several thousand years and recognised as one of the originators of wushu (武術). During the Great War, the Wudang Sect is politically aligned with the ICG (Independent Countries Group) and are amongst those whom covertly rises against the ruling Terra government as part of the May Fourth Movement sponsored by MARSA (Mars Advocate). The sect is a major power with considerable influence in the jianghu (江湖) or wulin (武林), as the martial artists' community is referred to in Eastasia. The current leader of the sect is Grandmaster Wu Dalang (武大郎), whom once fronted an industrial rock band, The Three Inch Nails. Wu Dalang may be a dwarf physically but the old man is a ferocious warrior whom was once on the run from the authorities for killing his adulterous wife. His students call him Yoda on acid behind his back. Male and female members of the Wudang Sect are known for their prowess in martial art, exemplary conduct and deeds of gallantry. They follow Taoist customs and practices in addition to training in martial arts.
Wu Wei is an orphan adopted by Wu Dalang at the age of three. He turns out to be an exemplary student. After an accident which caused severe facial damage, Wu Wei was sent to a non-descript, illegal plastic surgery clinic for facial reconstruction. The surgeon was quite committed as he is both indebted to and reveres Grandmaster Wu very much. Once the surgery is completed, Wu Wei's face is a work of art whose handsomeness would become a much discussed topic amongst members of Wudang Sect. The Merciful Iron, a cyborg member of the Eight Pandas, once remarked that Wu Wei's good look would rival even the Four Great Beauties of Eastasia. Female members of the Wudang Sect have to be segregated from Handsome Wu, as he is nicknamed thereafter, upon an incident bordering on scandalous nature. During the journey to New Andria, Handsome Wu is tasked with securing food for the group. He comes across an untainted pond, abundant with fishes. It is said that the fishes stop swimming and sank the moment they saw Handsome Wu. A flock of pheasants stood still when Handsome Wu capture them. The Eight Pandas announce their arrive with exclamation of '嗚啊! 嗚啊! 嗚啊!' Handsome Wu participation in the Robot Islands War causes some minor incident amongst the belligerent as well. Lil' Shadow could not take her eyes off him, resulting in a distraction which causes her to be injured. Tommy Mission becomes incredibly jealous of Handsome Wu as a result of this, making him unable to focus and is strafed by a dirty bomb. Cherry Shadow abandoned The Golden Dolphin amidst a battle to get Handsome Wu's vid-vox, resulting in the nut case being overwhelmed with berserker insanity and had to be calmed by his sister, Peppermint Groove. Baron Seth von Sydow is slack-jawed upon seeing Handsome Wu and suffered from a slight case of "bromance". Johan the Undefeated tried to pursue Handsome Wu and upon rejection, cause some tension between them.
Handsome Wu is a master of "Boundless Fist", also known as taijiquan. He primarily uses this technique in defensive or neutralising stance before launching a counter-attack or reactive stance upon his opponent. It is a martial art revolve around the concept of taiji, a philosophy representing the contrast in opposing categories, or the interplay of those categories usually termed as yin and yang or dark and light. It focuses on the use of "soft and gentle" techniques to overcome opponents who rely on brute strength and force. Wu would not directly fight or resist an incoming force, but to meet it in softness and follow its motion while remaining in physical contact until the incoming force of attack exhausts itself or can be safely redirected, meeting yang with yin. Handsome Wu has been observed to be able to re-direct a projectile or energy based weaponries and exhaust much stronger opponents using this technique.
Handsome Wu is also a master of another form of martial art, "Eternal Spring" or Wing Chun. It emphasise on correct body structure follows by balance. The martial art basis is said to be akin to a piece of bamboo, firm but flexible, rooted but yielding. This structure is used to either deflect external forces or redirect them. Wu, whom uses this martial art form for assault, rarely compromises structure for more powerful attacks because this is believed to create defensive openings which may be exploited. The "central axis" stance is important because it allows Wu to be effectively "rooted" or aligned. Braced against the ground, the force of a hit is far more devastating. Additionally, the practice of "settling" one's opponent to brace them more effectively against the ground aids in delivering as much force as possible to against the opponent. Apart from the "central axis", the "vertical axis" or "centre line" stance is equally important because attack within this central area allows Wu to transmit force more effectively, since it targets the "core center" of an opponent as well as striking closer to the centre transmits more force directly into the body of the opponent. Due to the emphasis on the centre line, the straight punch is the most common strike in Wing Chun. The punches may be thrown in quick succession in a "straight blast" or "chain punching". Wu would used this technique as a disorienting finisher. He would typically thrust his full body weight towards his opponent with the fist as the "nail" and his body as the "hammer". With each successive punch, Wu would step in closer and closer to the opponent, driving the fists forward as a hammer drives a nail. Wu would use this to pulverise his opponent, akin to The Phalanx apply by The F-Legion Cyborg 0024491.
Wu's neigong (內家) or inner energy and qinggong (輕功) or lightness skills are also amongst the best in the wulin. Wu could move swiftly and lightly at superhuman speed, and perform gravity-defying moves such as gliding on water surfaces, scaling high walls and mounting trees. He also possesses a powerful qigong (氣功) or life-cultivtion energy, involving the balance of body, breath and mind, leading to increase strength, vitality and quick healing. Chanelling this energy, Handsome Wu could withstand heavy strikes through "Iron Shirt" technique and break superhardened alloys through "Iron Palm". Force sword or blade, with its molecular disrupting field, could not slice through Handsome Wu nor a ceramic cutter. Handsome Wu other skill include dianxue (點穴) or the Touch of Death. He uses various acupuncture techniques to kill, paralyse, immobilise or control opponents by attacking their acupressure points with his bare hands or weapons. The N.O.M. Legion's Panzer Kunst is said to have been originated based on the same principle and evolved further by The Supreme Mother.
Another Handsome Wu ability is "Good Luck". It allows him to utilize probability manipulation in combination of physical combat. A form of tychokinetic fighting, Handsome Wu is able to utilize probability manipulation and merge it with physical combat, making him lucky, or induce bad luck on others, making absorbing the opponents luck or make the most unlikely things happen. He could heightened his chance of striking an opponent and conversely cause the latter to miss. Handsome Wu often invoke this ability when facing opponents far more formidable than him. However, the ability may cause unintentional effects to happen that could not be beneficial to Wu and those around him. This ability is based on the same principle as Tommy Mission's Hand of Fate but at lesser degree and affect.
Like all members of the Eight Pandas, Handsome Wu wears a Panda cosplay battle suit to hide his identity while travelling. The cosplay suit is armed with a pair of "Panda's Paw", a form of force weapon in the form of a lightning claw which could tear through any object on molecular level. Wu carries four .25 semi-automatic pistols and up to sixteen flash bang grenades as additional protection.
..............................................................
It has been a while since I gotten any new characters/figures from ThreeA's Adventure Kartel line, so when Handsome Wu, member of the Lucky Eight Panda Merc from Sichuan (according to the one page short comic) drop, I am quite excited. ThreeA continues the cosplay themed figures, which is not bad. And kind of fitting the eccentric universe of the AK line. This is another "chapter/phase" of AK, called "F***in' Family Coup", after the "Robot Island War". It took awhile for this figure to arrive. In hand it is great, no loose and floppy joints unlike the earlier figures. I did not take off the Panda suit all the way but from the images seen online, Handsome Wu sports a standard combat trousers. Handsome Wu is reminiscence of Tommy Mission but with a smirk. It also has the same gnarly large palms. The drop includes a two set pack, called The Three Fat Tarts Panda Mercs set. It include Handsome Wu and another F-Legion Cyborg look-alike call the F-Legion 6023. I maybe wrong but I recalled that F-Legion Cyborg would be the last of its kind. It doesn't matter as the official storyline or background is fluid and keep ret-conned/changing in terms of ThreeA major lines. The surprise drop of the day are Soot Wu, which I guess would be all black, and comes with a different/additional handgun, and Snow Panda F-Legion 6000, an all white with a RPG. I decided to go for just a standard version of Handsome Wu, which is just fine and at this point wanted to keep the 3AA membership F-Legion Cyborg exclusive in the collection. The official story is that after Lil' Shadow engaged The Dead Astronaut Gangsta to take out Tommy as his birthday gift, she changes her mind and contacted Handsome Wu and the Pandas, whom are engaging in a guerrilla warfare against robots, to save Tommy. Based on the one pager comic, there seemed to be animosity between Handsome Wu and Tommy and..."the adventure continues with you." Of course, as usual for fan fiction mis-interpretation part, I hadn't had any clue so again I used information from Wiki, the worlds of wuxia, a bit of WH40K and Battle Angel Alita.
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